Sunday, April 25, 2010

50 pounds in 150 days

alright, so its not exactly fifty pounds or 150 days. its more like 43 in 145. still it is an undertaking. my actual goal is to be 200 pounds by the time i go to germany this fall. which is roughly 50 pounds in 150 days.

i decided to launch this new campaign after a week of festivity and eating. for various reasons, i spent a great deal of time celebrating and being generally jovial. this of course required excess consumption of food. i made an inappropriately large and delicious asian meal and had friends over to gorge themselves on it with me so that i would not be alone in my gluttony. we excused this little binge with saying they dropped in for an episode of lost. naturally, all of the food was fried. general tso's chicken, fried rice and egg rolls to be precise. though it was delicious, i could feel the vast tides of oil i had used to cook the food just adding layer upon layer of chunky flesh and flab to my already flabby self.

in keeping up with the pathetic trend, i dines out with friends three other times, each time eating double or triple the humane amount. i felt slightly remorseful as i sat in cracker barrel, after having consumed one of the largest breakfasts on the menu. i thought about less fortunate children who were malnourished and rarely got a full meal, and here i just ate three times what i needed. but, oh! i bet she won't eat those fries! i wonder if anyone would mind if i took the last biscuit? you see that my sympathy lies not even skin deep.

so tomorrow is the new day. and i am starting over once again. blech. maybe i could save up for a lipo-suction.

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